Back On Track

I feel I am back at track. Late Thursday nights partying away in some god awful club until 5 o’clock in the morning or Sunday nights in German beer houses lending to Soho’s gayest club* are all behind me.

*The club is called G-A-Y.

Today, I’m bringing in the normality. Allowing myself a rare glimpse into a life I’ve never really allowed myself to settle into. This is it. Although, I’m not as panicked as I thought I would be. Dare I say, I’m kind of enjoying it.

I do have a cheaper vice replacing my alcoholism and today I am going to use it to brighten any tedium I might encounter. I am betting on the football. I got heavily into football following the last World Cup. On the World Cup I made a nice £100 on bets of £2 each. I’ve found myself now unable to miss a Fulham match (my team) and now I feel confident enough to bet on a few teams.

I’ve whet my appetite with three bets of £5. Two of them are pretty safe bets of four selections. The last one however is a crazy 13 selections with the chance of netting me £92,000. Lets hope I win that one!

Back To Basics

I don’t know why, but after almost a years hiatus, I’ve decided to restart blogging again. It’s one of those rash decisions I’ve made without really thinking it through.

However, I’m in the process of reinventing myself, trying to rid myself of my past bad habits. Although, I did come to the conclusion this morning that I might not need to reinvent myself at all. Maybe confusion is just all part of the process.

I don’t know. I’m not too certain of anything anymore.

I caught you watching me under the light
Can I realign?
They say it’s easy to leave you behind
I don’t want to try

Let’s see how long this lasts…

My Heavy Heart and I’m the Fool

Another twofer. Seems I can only write in twos these days.

My Heavy Heart

My heavy heart
has sunk once more
down to new depths.

That veil of trust,
pierced,
penetrated,
torn in betrayal.

The sky poured its sorrow
down on me
to cleanse my soul,
But it left me bare,
empty and cold.

I just can’t forgive
or forget,
just not yet.

By M.W.D. Lewis 18/02/2014

I’m the Fool

I’m the fool;
Blinded
by the love that kept us together.

And I thought;
Love
was to be for the better.

Now anger rules
and jealousy.
Trust abandoned
so carelessly.

My heart grows;
Weak
battered, worn and weathered.

By M.W.D. Lewis 19/02/2014

Drowning in a Single Malt

Hello there,

Yes, I realise I haven’t posted in a long time and when I did it was not incredibly interesting to say the least. Well, anyway, for those of you that might see this, I wrote two new poems over the past two days. Both are a bit gloomy and if I’m honest, I’m not really happy with either of them. But the internet has taught that it is always better to get some second opinions and criticism.

 

Drowned

I drown again
in the whirlpool of life,
floundering helplessly
and unable to stop.

Caught, and faith abandoned;
charred remains litter the bedside,
lonely and forgotten.

Fuelled by history
and ignited with a phrase;
what have you
and I become.

M.W.D Lewis
28/01/2014

It was only written yesterday and has had minimal editing. So please, all criticism welcome.

The Single Malt

A single malt,
aged about 27 years;
You should be ripe,
but instead you’re bitter.

The cork cracked
and crumbled away;
The label faded
and you forgot who you were.

Reputation and friends
eroded away.
Your flavour to strong,
for them to bare.

Now you’re lonely,
untouched and unloved.
Occupied by
a time long gone.

M.W.D Lewis
29/01/2014

This has had barely been edited. Let me know what you think. I realise neither are in my normal style of writing, but I praise my sudden poetry revival. I won’t lie, I can hardly remember the last time I wrote. So, watch this space… I suppose.

Yours Gratefully,

M.W.D. Lewis

Going Sober

The last few months have been hectic and I will explain all at a later date.

For the time being however, I am Going Sober in October to raise money for Macmillian Cancer Research.

The link: www.gosober.org.uk/profile/mwdlewis

And to help me to return to blogging, I have decided to track my journey here, because I almost failed today…

Go Sober – Day 1

No money donated yet, but it’s still early days. Almost failed the challenge before it had barely even started. On the way home from work I thought to myself, “Nobody will be at home, maybe I should go for a couple of pints at the pub.” I walked halfway there when I got an email from the Go Sober site about the first day. I felt incredibly foolish. How had I forgotten so quickly…

The situation may get worse as I have a friends and my partners birthdays coming up. We’ll see how this goes.